Louise's Life

Prayers for Nancy Grace

2008-01-15T16:36:00.002-08:00

I have a co-worker and dear friend, Nancy, who was hit by a car prior to Christmas. She is no longer in the ICU but had many bones broken and may never be the same.
I am not one for praying, but if you are, she could use the prayers, hopeful thoughts, positive energy and song that anyone cares to send her way. Reis and I visited her last week and it was a powerful experience. I never thought I'd see Reis cry in the hospital as she does it everyday.
Sadly, sometimes it takes a tradedy like this to remind us to cherish everyday, to appreciate the people we have and to be joyful for now.
Take a deep breath and be grateful for your health and your life.
I am.

Qualifying Ride for RTL

2007-12-18T22:06:00.000-08:00

Last weekend I completed my qualifying ride for Ride the Lobster.
For those of you unfamiliar, RTL is like the Toure de France for unicyclists. I am a part of Team Venus, possibly the only female team for the 5 day, 200km per day race through Nova Scotia, Canada.

http://www.ridethelobster.com/

Here are some pictures and info about my qualifying ride.

Day 1, 4 1/2 hours of riding.
8:15am - 12:45pm

The route:

http://www.bikely.com/maps/bike-path/Corbin-s-House-Reservoir

Distance: 40.4 km
Ascend: 1323 m
Descend: 1751 m
Soft Gravel: 2 km
RTL Rating: 206

Day 2: about 6 hours, 8:45am-2:45pm

http://www.bikely.com/maps/bike-path/shel-to-rob-s-route

Distance: 66.7km
Ascend: 771
Descend: 764
Prev rating: 206
Soft Gravel: 15km
Total rating: 190

Opening a Coconut

2007-04-12T08:13:00.000-07:00

We found a coconut and I learned how tricky it is to husk it and open it.

Hawaii

2007-04-07T18:13:00.000-07:00

Corbin and I finally took our Christmas vacation.
We had tickets to Maui to visit his dad last winter but we had to move the trip cuz he was working through his xmas vacation.
Well, Easter is tomorrow and we are finishing our wonderful week in Lahaina.
Some of the things we have done...

Brought our new "big" unicycles and rode around, including part of the way down the volcano, Haleakula. (Most of it we drove, but Corbin really wanted to ride up and down, all 10,000 feet of climb!!!)

Of course we went swimming, and it is easy cuz his dad has ocean-front property!

We went out in his dad's boat this morning and saw some whales, including a baby that was really quite tiny and totally playing in the water, flipping its tale all around. So cute!

I got ahold of another "health" book that is awesome and has things all of us should know. I highly recommend it. It is called "Natural Cures" by Kevin Trudeau. I spent my week obsessed with it, trying to seep all the information from it before we leave and I have to give it back to its owner (who hasn't even read it yet).

We went kayaking and hiking and of course ate a lot and spent a bit of time window shopping.

We had a bbq and little party for his dad's bday on April 5th.

I started most of my mornings with a jog on the beach and I feel so lucky to have had a chance to hang out in such a beautiful place for barely more than the price of the plane ticket.

I'm back to work on Monday but I feel so much more relaxed and happy having had a vacation.

Link

2006-11-24T16:03:00.000-08:00

I am not as good as I used to be at updating my blog. It seemed so much more exciting to tell people what I was up to when i was experiencing new things everyday in Europe or running away with the circus and living in New York City. Now my life is much quieter and I am completely content, happy and satisfied, but that isn't as exciting to read as adventure.
Corbin is better at updating his blog that I am, though, and often there are pictures of our house, which is being remodeled, and is a lot of what we do these days.

www.corbinstreehouse.com/blog

check it out

Pictures of the bunnies

2006-11-24T15:45:00.000-08:00

Lily is the white bunny
Ada is the grey bunny.
These pictures are from when we first got them. They are much bigger now.
Oh, how they grow.
And they are such trouble-makers but oh, so cute.
I hope they are doing ok right now. This is the longest we have left them since we got them: 3 days. We are at my mom's house and I gave them so much food and water and a huge box of hay for the weekend, but knowing them, they spilled it all in the first hour and it all fell between the holes in the cage.

Baby Bunnies

2006-09-20T14:38:00.000-07:00

Corbin and I are officially parents. We adopted 2 baby bunnies.
It was actually funny how this all came to be. When I was in Brooklyn, we had bunnies in our yard that were eating up our garden. When all that was left was stems, we got fed up caught them and gave them away on craigslist. Well, between the time when we caught them and found them homes, I grew quite attached. So now that I am in a big house, and we have space, I wanted to get a baby bunny. This past Sunday we went to the pet store to get some supplies and lo-and-behold, there was a rabbit shelter having an adoption day right there in the store. Well, I didn't see the bunny I wanted cuz they were all too big so I went to the lady in charge, Auntie Heather, and put in my order. There and then she pulled out two 3-month old bunnies. We only wanted one, but in the end we thought it was best for her to have a friend so we took them both.
We named one Lily, after my "aunt" Barbara Lily, who just left for a semester abroad. The other one is Ada, after Corbin's late mother, Grace Ada.
They are so cute and I am so excited to have them.
Here are some pictures or the cage, Lily venturing out of the carrying cage when they first arrived (Ada is more shy), and of their first meals in their new home.
(well, the photo files are too big and blogspot won't accept them. until i figure out how to shrink them, you'll have to imagine a cute white bunny with tan spots and a cute, fuzzy, grey bunny).

Home again, home again, giggety gig

2006-09-13T13:13:00.000-07:00

It has been brought to my attention that my last blog posting was some time ago and it says I am still in my last week in NY.
Well, nearly a month later, let me tell you I am not!
Happily nestled in the Santa Cruz mountains, once again, i wake up everyday with the trees out my window and Corbin's skin against mine. I think this is paradise, but don't tell cuz the price of housing is already too high. : )

I am loving it here. Life is relatively slow and I am thankful.
I was back for a mere 4 days and then rushed off to Burning Man. I haven't had time to get pictures together but Corbin posted some on his website, if you are interested. corbinstreehouse.com
go to 'pictures' and they should be there, I hope.

But that was fun. I danced and rode my unicycle around and met some acrobats and other fun people to play with. Corbin and I spent a lot of time together and it was nice to have that time, cuz now that we are back, we don't.

Speaking of being back, I'll first say I love it. The weather is perfect (unlike NY). We are spoiled rotten on the California coast. Corbin's house (or shall I say, "our house" as he so kindly corrects me) is in total disarray. We are remodeling and it is truly a construction zone. He works on it every spare minute and I try to help. We leveled the driveway and are digging a trench for the retaining wall. Soon it will be paved and the new, big deck will be underway. Can't wait for the deck.
I have been pulling off the dry-wall and he has been rewiring the house, rebuilding the shed, replacing ducts and all kinds of things. What a project!
I wish I could be more helpful but I am learning and in the meantime I cook dinner and clean up and try to be open to learning how to do the more "manly" things that look fun.
But I do really enjoy having my own kitchen and spending time in it.

Reis and i have been practicing a bit. We are starting a band. It is lovely to practice outside with the trees as our audience. They are so forgiving!
Her songs are really good and I am excited to be singing again.

Speaking of singing again, I am singing with the Choral Project again. I called the director and told him I was back and he invited me back, which is a huge honor cuz they are amazing. I am like a kid; days before rehearsal I get all excited to go and sing. I'll keep you posted on concert dates.

Unicycling is back in my world, which I missed while I was busy doing other fun things. I have some buddies that ride every Tuesday and Thursday afternoon. I have been out once but hope to do more. And the annual Mountain Unicycle Weekend is coming up. I have missed the past 2 years so I am excited to ride it again.

Corbin, JoanMarie, Jay and I took a trip to Yosemite last weekend. Corbin and I did some rockclimbing. (I have some practicing to do to keep up with him but he is patient, at least).
It was so amazingly beautiful. Brooklyn aint got nothing on those mountains of granite!
I look forward to many weekends to go and play. I missed having weekends off.

That is about it for now.
Pictures to come.
If you are in the bay area, find me! My phone number is the same as it was before.

Last week in NYC

2006-08-16T12:30:00.000-07:00

Well, the time has come, my furry friends, to wrap things up. I got back from Georgia, tired and hurting from pushing myself too hard, but eager to make the most of my last couple weeks in NY. (Athough directing and performing in the show downt here was an amazing experience. I sure do give orders better than i take them...hee hee).
After a few days of training, I decided it was best to stop that all together, just save my energy for teaching, and spend my extra time seeing NYC. I mean, how is it possible that I have been here 8 months and hardly seen the city? So, that has been my job lately, (besides odd babysitting jobs and teaching some evenings). I've had a great time eating out, enjoying central park, which is amazing this time of year. We even had a couple beautiful, not-too-humid, clear, blue days to enjoy. I have been catching up with my friends, meeting cool Kenyan acrobats backstage at a circus, going to comedy clubs and packing my life into boxes.

My ticket home is booked for this coming Monday! Burning Man prep will occupy the few days after that and then Corbin and I head out to the Neveda Desert for another Burning Man adventure. For those who have forgotten, that is where I met this circus group and got myself invited to NY last year, so who is to say what will transpire this year.

In terms of life back in California, I have done my best to set up work and activities that will begin as soon as I hit the ground. I will be working 5 days a week upon returning, teaching and nannying like before, saving up and hopefully going to cosmetology school next year.
I have been invited back to sing with The Choral Project (amazing choir!), which I am honored and excited about, and have plans to play music with my sister(s), in some form or another.
Corbin's house needs work, and he has a million projects already set aside for me, as I hear.
I am really looking forward to getting my butt back in shape the way only ISK kickboxing can do (since I am not training now, I am feeling the lack of exercise in my body, which is different from the over-use pain, but has its own drawbacks).
Then there is unicycling that I have missed terribly and a million other hobbies and interests that I may embark on at some point. Needless to say, I am still me, busy and excited about life, and will in no way be bored without my 30 hours/week circus training schedule.

The company I am leaving is doing really well, though. We had some members leave as of late (not just me), so that is a fall-back, but the core that is left is strong and able. Besides the performance company, the education sector is soon to become The New York Circus Arts Academy, which is very exciting. (I was offered a job teaching for them, but I didn't come here to teach, I came here to perform--although I was still honored at the suggestion). It is a little sad to leave such an exciting project in its infant state, but I know it is in good hands.

I think that is all the news for now. For those of you reading this in the bay area, I would love to hang out, catch up and have you over (yup, I am taking over the house already). : ) when I get back, so get ahold of me.
For the rest of you, this blog may become scarce when I am back, as the life of a music teacher isn't as exciting as a world traveler or one who runs away from the circus, but check back for occational unicycle pictures or performance updates, as I hope to never be truly boring.

I'm adding a few pictures from NYC: central park and such.

Ground Act

2006-08-08T15:55:00.000-07:00

Here are some pictures of Ashley and I and some of the Ground Act poses from the 4-person acrobatics act. Ashely and I modified and did a shorter 2-person version at the show in Athens, Georgia last Friday. These pictures were taken in the driveway of her mom's house and during the performance.

Georgia on my Mind

2006-08-06T08:42:00.001-07:00

No, really, I am in Georgia and California is on my mind, but no one wrote that into a song.
I do have to say that Georgia is quite beautiful, and besides the humidity, the woods are pretty and the thunderstorms are fun and the southerners sure do know about hospitality and kindness. I am amazed at how sweet everyone has been and I have been eating some good southern food: eggs in a basket, butter beans, fried okra, corn bread, spinach soufle and all kinds of things I would have never thought to cook.

So what am I doing in Georgia? Well, one of the other girls in the circus company, Ashley, is from Georgia. We came down to teach and perform last February on our southern tour and we were asked back to do a week-long residency at a great space called Canopy. Canopy was started by a woman who never had kids and instead made her love for dance and trapeze into her child by opening this studio on the north end of Athens, Georgia. (Athens is like a little Santa Cruz in the middle of the south. Cute little town). She has a great studio with over 12 rigging points so you can have numerous people on trapeze or silks at the same time.

Ashley was already down here for a wedding, but they wanted one more person to help teach classes and set up a show for the end of the week. Well, that was me. I suppose I am the only one who was disposable enough to leave for a week since I am not in any acts right now. Also, I am also the only one with trapeze experience and Canopy has more trapeze students than silk students, so it was a good choice, I think. I never knew I had such a knack for directing, but I really stepped in and had a great time running the show.
So ya, we taught classes and I picked the music and set the counts and modified the choreography I was given to work with and put together a show. Ashley and I also performed a short silks duet that we never even rehearsed fully with the music, so that was a little nerve-wracking. We also spent a bit of time modifying the 4 person ground acrobatics act (that I was in before I was injured) so we could perform it with just two of us. That was a real hit, although next time I have to remember to wear a shirt that isn't so low cut cuz I literally fell out of it while in a handstand, if you catch my drift.

We are headed back to NYC today. I am kind of dreading going back. I am really homesick and much prefer the beauty of Georgia to the smelly ghetto of Brooklyn, if I must be away from California.
I pushed myself too hard here and my old injuries are really giving me grief, but I guess that is okay cuz I don't have much longer that I will have to deal with such force on my body. For those who haven't heard yet, the director and I decided that it is best if we cut my contract short due to my continual injured condition and I will be moving back to California next month. I am so excited to come home, be with the people I love and give my body a break from circus work.

There will be a coming home/house warming party in September at Corbin's new house. Details will be posted next month.
hugs all around.

There's no place like home

2006-07-17T18:22:00.000-07:00

Although, I don't really know where my home is these days. I pay rent in Brooklyn, NY but my boyfriend just bought a house and moved in yesterday which will hopefully one day house my kids, so maybe that is my home....

Anyway, backing up a bit, the rib wasn't broken but the doctor suspected I had torn the cartilage or the muscle and many of the ribs were out of place. I still had to take 7 weeks totally off of training. I was back in California for 2 1/2 weeks. It was wonderful. I forgot what paradise is. Warm and dry (instead of hot and humid) and it smells like trees (instead of trash). I worked a bit nannying, which was fun, and took the weekends to head to beautiful places like Kings Canyon and Mt. Shasta. I spent a lot of time with Corbin and got to make lots of music with my family. I finished the musical composition for the circus ground act and my amazing family helped me record a slightly rushed but workable recording. It was enough for the director to hear it with the voices and instruments and say it is great and I out-did myself. That was nice. Thanks family!

It is interesting, cuz now that I am back in NY and I am training full-time, I am happy to be back. I love the group I work with, (for the most part). I like using my body all day like that and collaborating of artistic projects. But the rib is hurting just a touch again (that is what it felt like in the beginning, so I am a little concerned). I like the company and the direction things are going.
We have performances all week next week and in August I will be going to Georgia on "tour" (really just to teach workshops for a week). But interestingly enough, when I was in California, I didn't miss it here at all, and although I like it here, I do miss many things about home.

Everyone seems to think the adventuresome life is so great. You know, the grass is always greener, but life is just life and yours is the only one you have. The beauty of life are the small and often quiet moments, fresh air and laughter and the people that you love. And often times, time off to spend doing whatever I choose that day is worth more than being the star in the show. Maybe it's just me.
If I could leave sooner, I would go home now, but contracts don't work as such. Maybe there are more things I need to learn here to be a more whole person.... who knows?

anyway, pictures from my trip to California:
(my musical family, my crazy boyfriend wearing my bikini top, Corbin's new house on the summit between Santa Cruz and Los Gatos, and my eyes in the sun while laying on a rock at the river in King's Canyon).

Series of Unfortunate injuries

2006-06-03T20:18:00.000-07:00

Seems this is the year of travel, change, fun, growth, opportunity, challenges and INJURIES.

First, it was my right ankle when I was in Barcelona last October. That took a solid 4 months to be back to where I could run on it again. Then, in the beginning of January during my first day in rehearsal here with Firefly Aerial Acrobatics, I sprained my other ankle. Then in February, my back started to hurt so bad that I was off of training for weeks.
After that, I was fortunate enough to have a good 6 weeks or so where I was training a ton. My handstands were getting much better, my skills on the silks and my over-all strength was getting to a more professional level, and I was cast in a 4 person ground acro act. I was really stoked on it all.
But, about a month ago, my ribs started to hurt. I didn't want to complain (or deal with the doctor since my insurance sucks and won't really cover it). I tried to ignore it, but gradually it got worse and I started doing less of certain things that really aggravate it. About a week ago it got so bad that I couldn't do anything. I was awake all night (for several nights in a row) cuz the pain was so intense. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't cry....you can imagine I was worried. Cypher agreed to pay for me to get my ribs x-rayed.
I went to see an amazing doctor in Manhattan. I haven't gotten the x-rays done yet (I had to schedule a separate apt. with a radiologist) but he suspects that I have fractured one of my floating ribs. It's not dangerous, cuz it isn't near any organs, but it hurts like hell, and if it really IS fractured, I'm off training for another 6 weeks.

As you can imagine, I am a bit frustrated with the whole thing. The company is really moving to an exciting place right now where there is finally funding to pay us to train full-time! Who would have thought that I could be a paid circus artist? But alas, I have to sit around for 6 weeks and watch the others perform the act that I was once in and learn new tricks that I want to be learning. I suppose it is a lesson in patience.

Since I can't be here training for awhile, I am heading back to California to see Corbin and my family and friends and rest up a bit. I should be in town starting the end of June. I will have to make a bit of money since I won't be in NY working (if anyone needs childcare or other odd jobs), and I would love to see ya'll.

For now, I am working on getting the time off to go home for a bit, supposedly composing a 7 minute, 5-voice composition for the ground act (uh-huh, sure i am), teaching aerial classes, organizing for the student recital and drinking more beer than maybe I should be since I am not getting much exercise. : )

I would love to hear what the rest of you are up to, if anyone is reading this anymore.

Much love, Louise

Metallic Red Unitard

2006-05-07T18:14:00.000-07:00

More unitards came in the mail.
Jordann (my housemate and "wife"--I wake up and make breakfast for her and she makes homemade chai tea for me) and I got matching unitards. The pictures don't do them justice, but they are fun.
And my handstands are much more solid, although clearly not quite solid enough to get a picture that isn't blurry.
Alas. I am excited about it. They are my new obsession. I am practicing handstands at every occation--the subway, the park but mostly after classes and in every spare moment of rehearsal.

I am working with 3 other women on a 4 person ground acrobatic act. It is quite fun. A couple of the girls are new and the new energy and excitement is contagious.

Having a good time out here....

More Photos from the Dresden Dolls Concert

2006-05-01T18:21:00.000-07:00

I recently recieved some photos from an amazing photographer that was taking pictures of us crazy circus freaks at the concert we went to a couple weeks ago. I am impressed. It was not an easy space to shoot. He's a damn good photographer. Check out his site:
GlenTuttle.com

Webster Hall Concert Crazies

2006-04-23T15:01:00.000-07:00

The Dresden Dolls (a band from Boston) came to NYC for their C.D. release party last night. Some friends and I decided to go, so we got all dressed up pretty and went out.
Being as short as I am, I couldn't really see, but seeing musicians isn't as fun as dancing anyway. We went up to the balcony and found some empty space in the back where we could dance.

But, being obsessed with handstands and walkovers and basic acro skills, I spent the whole time playing around with that. Luckily I had some partners in crime.

(The skirt I was wearing didnt last long as I couldn't do acro in it. : ) )

We attracted several photographers, one of which emailed me photos. With my busy training and working schedule I don't experience NYC night life very often, but last night was a blast.

Yellow SuperHero

2006-04-15T08:25:00.000-07:00

Well, since we spend such a large percentage of our lives around here in the circus business wearing leotards and unitards and otherwise obnoxiously tight spandex-like clothing, we have opted for a more colorful batch to increase the tacky aspect of it all. A few good laughs help the reality that no-one really looks good in a unitard.

My latest addition is the most blinding yellow one could imagine, which can easily be transferred into a bug outfit, add a cape for a superhero, or wings for a glowing fairy.
Let your imagination run wild.

Photos!! Trapeze, Silks, Handstands...

2006-04-02T20:25:00.000-07:00

.

Finally, pictures of what I do. Not such great pictures, as my camera is sort of cheap...as in free (I found it while unicycling), but at least it is something.

The trapeze stuff are shots from the routine I am working on. I just recently got "promoted" so my trapeze is a bit higher off the ground now.

The silks are a load of fun. That is me in a prep position before I let go of the fabric and do a "drop."

The handstand I just finally was able to ballance and hold for awhile today. That was my big achievement of the day.

Training is fun. I can finally climb the rope and silks with NO FEET (pulling all me weight up with just my upper body). That is exciting cuz it means I am getting stronger. They keep teasing me that I will be so top heavy pretty soon, but I think I still have the hips and booty to ballance it all out. : )

Moab MUni Fest 2006

2006-03-30T07:16:00.000-08:00

Well, it is amazing what a little begging will do for you. It's a shame I didn't figure it out until long after childhood, but at least I have the skills now.
Let me back up...
Every year there is an amazing mountain unicycle event in Moab, Utah. Every year I think about it but can't pull the time or money together to make it. But this year, being in the concrete and cold weather of NYC, and missing Corbin and my other lovely muni friends, I decided it was a must.
Being part of a circus company includes many hours of training, performances and with the tight-knit group we have, it becomes like family...to the point of having to ask permission to take a weekend off. So slightly scared, but knowing there was no way around the conversation if I truly wanted to leave town, I asked the director if I could go. We passed the ball of reasoning back and forth, why it wasn't an injury risk, why missing three rehearsals wouldn't be a tragedy to the company, why it was important to me. And in the end, I just layed my head on his chest and said "please, please, please...," blinking my big blue eyes at him all along. Two hours later, I had won.

And it was worth it! I had one of the best weekends of my life.
The rocks and mountains are amazing, with red rock formations on one side and snow-capped mountains on the other.

The trails were incredible for riding and I was riding better than ever. Although, that could have been due to the fact that I was on a borrowed unicycle that had longer cranks and more tread on the tire than mine. (I packed my unicycle and safety gear and it got lost somewhere between NY airport and Salt Lake City. I spent all weekend on the phone trying to get it back, but in the end, I just picked it up again at the end of it all when I was back in the airport. The unicycle community is amazingly kind and generous and they found me a unicycle to ride. I taped up my ankles to protect them, but the lack of a helmet was just misfortune, not a fashion statement).

And besides all the amazing rides, the good friends, the beer and hot tub and the new bruises, the best part was seeing Corbin again and knowing he's the one.
It was sickly romantic and just plain wonderful to stare into his eyes again. I have run all over the planet, searching for myself and chasing my dreams and now I can knowingly say that when I come back to the bay area and marry him, it will be exactly what I want.
I still have months left here in NY, though, and I'm enjoying it all. We had our first spring-like day today, and more are promised by Mr. Weatherman.
The company has its own difficulties, as one member broke a rib last week and another packed her bags and left this morning. But the few that are left are dedicated and training hard for our summer tour, which will be nearly 3 months!

Missing you all back home and I will see you in 2007, when I come "home" to be with the man I love.

Happy Birthday at the Grill

2006-03-02T06:23:00.000-08:00

Well, the 27th birthday came and went, and it was a fabulous relaxing day on tour.
I hung out all day in the SUN (imagine that!), drank coffee, read a book, took a nap on the grass, went shopping and had a very nice day with no rehearsals and no driving in the happy little town of Athens, Georgia.

We went out to dinner at the only restaurant open at our normal dinner hour (after 11pm), so burgers and fries it was. I swear, we are going to be the first fat circus.

Evidence that we love to eat!

Group shot!

Check my I.D. It's my birthday!

Heaven help us. We are in the south and we went to Walmart!

And apparently loved it.
(scary)

Firefly Tour, performance #1

2006-02-26T08:06:00.000-08:00

First performance of the February 2006 tour for Firefly Aerial Entertainment went well. It was an amazing party; like Marti Gras in North Carolina. You can check out the website if you care to at www.castlemccolloch.com. You can get an idea of what kind of events go on, and you can get a video clip of the same party last year.
Basically, this guy wanted to build a castle in the woods in North Carolina....so he did. It isn't as big I would have thought, but it is beauitful and the grounds are amazing. They had various tents set up around the grounds with different parties and performances all night, fire dancers and drum circles and EVERYONE was in costume. I was impressed.

We drove from NYC to Baltimore and then D.C. on Thursday. We stayed at (my sister) Reis' friend Yvette's house overnight. We drove down to North Carolina on Friday and we leave this morning, Sunday, for Georgia, where the tour continues.

The tour started out a little rocky...people just not getting along so well and unresolved issues, but as it continues, we are loving eachother more and more and bonding and having a wonderful time. I am very happy to be here and experiencing this with these amazing people.

Meet the crew:

These are the female performers in the company:
Courtney, Me (louise), Rachel, Ashley

Our amazing make-up artist and costume designer makes us all pretty. (this is the director, Cypher, getting his face painted).

Rachel and I in our stage make-up, back stage in the green room.

Me, hanging from the silks, in the castle, during our third set. It was so fun to perform!!!

Firefly goes on Tour

2006-02-22T19:07:00.000-08:00

Even though I will be participating as an injured member who pretty much just sits around and stretches, the circus group I am in, Firefly, is leaving on tour tomorrow morning. We head out of NY early Thursday, Feb. 23rd and go to Baltimore to audition a potential new member. The heavens have finally granted me time with my sister, Reis, who coincidentally will be in D.C. visiting her friend, Yvette when we pass through that way. Yvette and her good-natured housemate have agreed to let 7 poor circus artists crash on her floor for the night. It will be good to hang out with them. I am excited.

We then head down to North Carolina, Georgia, Virginia and full circle back to D.C. and then home to NY.

I will hopefully have pictures of the tour to post at some point. I am bringing my camera, which has been sitting around collecting dust cuz I always forget to take it with me when I leave the house.

As for pictures of me performing...
Well, there won't be many as my part in the show is all of 30 seconds because my back is really quite bad. I finally sat down with the director in tears, and explained that as much as I want to train, the pain is too much and I need a break for a couple weeks so my back can heal---whatever is wrong with it.
I saw a doctor last week and was taking a prescription of cortizone but it did no good.
We had a student recital and performance last Sunday, for which I performed my trapeze act I have been working on. One go was all I had before the pain was too intense, so I saved it for the actual performance (hadn't practiced for over a week prior) but it was fun and I got a lot of good comments such as "You looked great" "Weightless" "great stage presence" "Your underwear were sticking out of your leotard." :) (well, most of the comments were good).
Hopefully at some point I will have permission to post some of the photos the photographer took.

I am excited for this little adventure we are calling a tour. I am prepared with 5 hours of c.d.s on "non-violent communication" for in the van on the way (I'm sure everyone else will be really excited about that--but I am telling you, we could use it around here cuz there is a lot of bickering).

Hugs back "home"

The long, snowy path

2006-02-13T17:38:00.000-08:00

Hey all

If anyone is still keeping up with this oh-so-rarely updated blog, know that I miss you all.
I miss the weather in California.
I miss my family and the love of my life.
I miss my unicycle and the Santa Cruz mountains.
I miss getting enough sleep.
I miss my girls.
But I love my new family here and the common goal.

There was an amazing blizzard on Sat. night and Sunday. I wish I got a picture while all the snow was fresh. It was amazing. Like 18 inches or more of snow overnight! Wind and big snowflakes floating every which way. It was hard to believe they were going down, cuz they all just looked like they were going to float sideways or on circles forever. I was screaching and jumping up and down with excitement, while my housemates were calling me a big dork and feeling annoyed at the inconvenience and wondering how it would effect getting to rehearsal. Our rehearsal space is rarely more than 15-20 degress warmer than the outside temperature and the HIGH yesterday was 29 degrees F so you can guess how cold it is to stretch and train. Kind of dangerous actually.

I wonder if that is why I injured my back.
Yes, you got it, folks. First my right ankle, then my left and now the right sub-scapular area in my back. I have been off training since Thurday night (I hurt it on Wed. but tried to train until I really couldn't stand the pain--smart). I got a massage but it made it worse. Cypher, the director, finally convinced me to see a dance injury or sports medicine specialist. So I got an appointment, but it is sort of stressing me out because with our tour coming up in less than two weeks, I won't even make enough to pay rent for March, let alone be able to afford a doctor visit.
But I guess that is the best use for a credit card--to take care of my health when I can't afford to.
And then there is the TOUR that I am supposed to be performing a trapeze act in but I can't train right now. Arg.

When we get back from tour I need to either:
A. get a raise
B. get a new job that pays more
C. get another job and work on my one day off
cuz I'm just not making it financially, and I already cut out everything that could be cut.
But that is the life of a poor artist, or someone with a full-time hobby. : )
I love it. It is worth being a little broke.

The tour should be fun. We are going to North Carolina and Georgia and Virginia. And we were going to D.C. but I am bummed that got canceled because it is my birthday weekend and my little sister was going to coincidentally be in D.C. that weekend. Bummer.

I guess that is the one thing that is getting to me a little. I miss my friends and family back home and I know the life in this line of work doesn't offer a 2-week vacation time to go on a cruise or a unicycle festival or a family camping trip. There are no days off--not consecutive. I miss being outdoors in the sun and riding or hanging out in nature with my friends. The summer will be busy with gigs here and touring, which is great in its own way, but leaves me little time to visit. I'll just have to throw big parties when I am on that side of the states again so I can see everyone all at once when I pass through town while we are on tour.

The community here is amazing, though. I already know more people that have similar interests here than I met in years in the bay area. There is quite a tight, underground art community that is really fun to be a part of.

I went to a cool party last weekend. It was run by members of the "freak factory." It was a very burning man type event: costumes and d.j.'s and people wandering around serving snacks, and a kissing booth for Valentine's Day with mints and Hershey's kisses.
I had a great time meeting people and hanging out. I ran into a bunch of students from the circus classes we teach and I even met a guy who looked like Elvis, (he even had the glasses) who I ended up staying up till 4am talking to. I get out very rarely, but when I do, it really makes me feel better and is fun. I love to dance!!! If you haven't been out for awhile, I highly recommend getting out and shaking your rump a bit, cuz it sure clears the mind.
(although it doesn't really help a bad back).

I am currently involved in a HUGE cooking project in my kitchen. I am alone in my house--a rare event. And we dancers eat SO much food. Our grocery bill is crazy and we go shopping every other day, it seems. But at least we aren't going hungry and no one around here is gaining weight so we must need it all.
I am cooking split pea soup and rice and beans and a curry vegetable thing...yummy

This must be the most boring blog ever, but really, my life is pretty dull day-to-day. The "glory" of running away with the circus is really just long hours of training in a cold room, bruises, sore muscles, long hours at work to pay the rent, late nights planning the next tour, long, cold walks to and from work, good books on the subway (thanks reis and JM) and many good laughs with the others walking the long road with me. I love waking up every day and knowing I am improving and following my heart, but there isn't much to talk about.

I always love to get email and know what all those that I left back home are doing.
Hugs to All.
And I'll try to post pictures soon...

living a dream

2006-01-17T08:49:00.000-08:00

My first couple weeks in NY have come and gone and I am getting into the swing of my new life here. Sometimes I have a hard time believing it is my life. It feels like a dream to be part of such a great team of circus artists and even though I am so far behind and have so much to learn, they have embraced me as part of the company. I train 20 hours a week with the other performers. I also attend 8-10 extra hours of classes a week, given by the director as part of the education and outreach (and financial help) part of the company. So ya, it is a lot. And I am sore all the time. The ankle is slowly getting better but it is still mostly upper body, abs and flexibility stuff I am training now. I am off floor work (acrobatics) for a couple months just to be safe. Bummer, but it isn't worth getting injured again. Instead, I train lots of drills on the aerial silks, conditioning exercises, stretching and I even started trapeze, which apparently i will put together an act on for our late February tour. (aahhhh!--it's all new to me but I am working hard). I am learning so much and have so far to go. But we talk a lot about a long path and how that is desirable cuz it gives us somewhere to go and something to work for.

As far as work, I am working a lot. I have two different families that I am nannying for:
One has a 10 month old boy, Henry, who is so sweet and I love the parents.
The other has a 5 year old boy with Asberger's Syndrom (*a mild type of Autism) and is obsessed with Music Togther. He has perfect pitch and knows every Music Together song there is, better than me. His mom is a professional pianist and they sit and play songs and sing together. It is so sweet.

Both families are wonderful in their own way and are working around my training schedule and touring schedule and are both walking distance from our rehearsal space. The universe is looking out for me, I guess. Someone once told me if you tell the world what you need and what you have to offer, others will do the rest. I guess it is true.

I could sure use a hug, if anyone wants to send one my way, because as much as I love my life here, being across the country from the love of my life is hard. I miss you, Corbin.

Oh, and I am reading a fabulous book that my sister gave me for Christmas. "Smart Women Finish Rich" by David Bach. Highly recommend it, not just for women. It isn't just a guidebook to finances and future, it is about values and goals and dreams and if you haven't read it yet, it is a must. At least I think so.

Off to work,

Hugs to all,
and dont forget to live your dreams.

The Big Apple, as they say...

2006-01-06T18:51:00.000-08:00

Well, friends, fans, family....

Here I am in NYC.
I am here as an apprentice for a circus/dance company called firefly dance. (fireflydance.com) Cypher, the director, has committed to training me and making me part of the team. I am so excited. I met him at Burning Man (an arts festival) last summer. Funny how one festival can change your life...

I live in Brooklyn. The living space is great. We have a nice 2 story, 3 bedroom house with a basement and a backyard. Yes, in NYC! I am living with the director of the company, another apprentice (like me!) and a couple other company members. So far, so good. We are like one big happy family, well, there are only 3 of us currently, but we buy all our food and cook and eat like a family, stretch and clean and organize and practice handstands in the living room. It is like a dream come true. I have been craving the community so badly, and I appreciate it all even more after my challenges in Barcelona.

In terms of my running streak of bad luck, I thought it was over cuz I got here and had a house with great rent and everything was going perfectly in terms of the housemates and weather and company members and the performance they put on New Year's Eve....but alas, I guess some of my bad luck followed me because in all my care not to hurt my ankle again, (the right one that I sprained 6 weeks ago hopping up a staircase on my unicycle), I sprained my OTHER ANKLE in my first day of training, trying to do a front hand spring (which I obviously wasn't able to do). So I am really gimpy now. I was unable to walk at all for a couple days, but some nice lady at a store overheard me saying I needed crutches, and lo-and-behold, had an extra pair next door. So that helped. And after getting lugged all over the city on the back of Cypher's motorcycle because I couldn't walk to the subway, I am now on my own and able to hobble down the street with a slight limp. I should be back to training in no time.

I had my first job interview today and I have another one tomorrow and next week. It is so much easier since I speak the language and have papers to work legally! I always took it for granted till I went to Barcelona and getting even a lame job was next to impossible. Now finding time to work outside my training and a job that will work around our tour schedule will be another story, but for a great nanny....it should be worth it. :)

Missing the California weather, even the storms, as I ride around on the back of a motorcycle with my eyes frozen shut (NY in January!) It's cold here, but I am happy. I am in the right place for this time in my life.

Thanks to everyone in my life who loves and supports me. Those are the important "things" in life, as I am learning.
Many hugs and sorry I didnt get to see everyone when I was back on the West Coast. The time went so fast. But anyone is welcome out to NY. I have my own room!

Hugs all around,

Louise Lovelle

Moving To NY

2005-12-29T22:38:00.000-08:00

Hi all,
I'm moving to NY tomorrow!
-Louise

Roses

2005-12-12T09:54:00.000-08:00

When people talk about the Mediterranean being paradise, they aren´t kidding. I spent the weekend in a little town, a lot like Santa Cruz, really, called Roses (pronounced: Rosas). It is north of Barcelona, the point farthest east in Spain, and the bay is so beautiful. The hills and mountains surrounding the water are full of green trees and colorful houses spot the hillside. (if anyone is into real estate, I have the place for you, as houses are still only 120,000 Euros or so...)

My housemate is from there, and I met a friend of his last month. We got along really well, and when I didnt understand him, I just smiled and nodded :) --like I always do. He invited me to his town for the weekend. What a sweetheart. He showed me all around. We went to the largest fortress in all of Europe and a history museum. It is just so rich here, the things that happened and the old, vacant buildings. Some of it is thousands of years old, it just blows my mind at times.

The night was sort of funny. We went to the store to buy vegetables, because I am a vegetarian and he didn´t know what to feed me. Well, here you have to weigh the fruits and veggies before you get to the counter. Even I figured that out, but he didn´t know. I guess he doesn´t cook. So when I asked him, he said, "oh, no" and proceded to the check-out counter. Well, she sent him back to weigh them. When he finally came back, he had done it wrong, so she had to go do it herself and wasn´t very happy with us. We laughed and laughed. Then we headed to his mom´s house to borrow dishes and oil and salt!!! because he didn´t have any at home. Not even silverware! And his mom was so funny. She kept offering us more stuff: juice and toilet paper and all kinds of stuff. It was cracking me up.

As it turns out, he just moved into that house, out of his mom´s house...at 33 years old. So there was really not much in the house, no warm water or cold fridge, so we had to keep the milk for breakfast outside where it was cold. When it came time to sleep, he only had one blanket. Well, I didn´t really know what to say. He was respectful and didn´t try to take advantage of me...he really is sweet, but we had to sleep really close to stay warm. I tried, but couldn´t sleep cuz I am not really used to sleeping with someone I hardly know. So finally, after the sun came up and I hadn´t fallen asleep yet, I moved to the couch and used my jacket as a blanket. Originally, I´d thought of staying one more night, but decided not to for obvious reasons. As you could imagine, I was so tired after that.

As for what we did during the days, mostly we spent the time with his friends and family. I was all smiles. That is why I do this: give up everything I have to go somewhere else. It´s to sit at a big table, full of his brothers and sisters and their partners and kids, and his way-to-generous mother, and talk and laugh and try to understand what is going on. And there are few things in this world that give me the satisfaction of finally understanding, of having a conversation with all these people in another language and being able to be an active part in the conversation. And we were talking about politics and religion...it isn´t easy stuff. Although, somedays are better than others and some times I still have no idea what someone is talking about. Poco a poco, as they say (little by little).

I do miss California, though, and one reason is because it pains me to see EVERYONE smoking all the time. I mean, everyone, and with the cigarette´s second hand smoke right in the kids faces, too. It makes me sick and I worry about them all in the future. But, of course, it is not for me to say anything, so I pretend it doesn´t bother me. I didn´t come here to be a "greater than thou" American.

So that was my adventure in Roses. It was wonderful and the beauty of the trees and nature and ocean was healing. I get a little burnt in the city all the time. I am back in Barcelona for my last week!! How does time fly so fast? I head back to California in a week and then just before we say goodbye to 2005 (wow!) I will be in NYC.
Love to all. If anyone needs a hug or has an extra bed or needs childcare the week of Christmas and lives in the bay area, my number and email will be the same. Hugs!

Beautiful moments

2005-12-07T14:19:00.001-08:00

I just want you all to know that my life here isn´t all sprained ankles, stolen wallets, missed flights and break-ups. No, there are so many wonderful moments, so I thought I´d log a few of the latest.

Beautiful moments:

I went out the other night with a friend of mine. We were walking along a bridge that connects La Rambla (a popular street) with Barceloneta (a floating shopping center in the port). The moon was a small crescent in the fading blue sky, with a single star hanging over the moon. All the boats were lit up and the ocean refected all the beauty, as suble waves tried to enter the port. We tried to capture it on a camera phone, but we would have needed Corbin´s new, fancy digital. Alas, all I have are the memories in my brain.

This week is a holiday week, so I had no Spanish class Tues. or Thurs. I took the day on Tuesday to go to the Museum of Catalunya. It was a sunny but cold and windy day. I walked toward the museum, passed an old car show and up a couple hundred stairs, being as the museum is up on a hill. After each staircase, I turned to look at the colorful European city below, as it got farther and farther away. Finally, at the top there were two, huge marble statues, which looked almost black against the sky and buildings below. The wind whipped my scarf and my hair (or what´s left of it, as I cut it all off). It chilled my face and I sat watching, smiling at the world beyond and thankful for my life, and the precious moments.
And the art museum was cool too, but that was the highlight.

Strange People in the Metro:

So earlier today, at 2pm on a Wednesday, there was a couple, maybe in their early 30´s smoking crack or herione on the Metro!!! Shamelessly, with an entire roll of aluminum foil, not even facing their backs to us or hiding in a bathroom. They each had a little square of foil with some white rock/powder on top, and lit a light beneath, and sucked the smoke right off and then blew it into the tram, where we could all get high. I was so aghast, and really sort of annoyed as they were right in front of me. So finally I moved, still wondering how they can get away with that. I guess growing up in the US, I didnt realize how lawless other places are. Each to their own.

all right, hugs to all and good luck to TCP.
Go see them!! Choral Project. google it if you need to. they are awesome!!!

More beautiful moments...

2005-12-07T14:19:00.000-08:00

Music on the Streets:

I have seen some great street shows so I´ll tell you about a couple. There seems to always be music. My favorite so far has been these two guys with drums and bells and several digereedoos a piece playing some digereedoo techno stuff. They had their mouths blowing and the bells on their ankles ringing and played some phat rhythms on the drums. I literally sat down in front of the crowd of people and stayed for the whole show. Should have bought the c.d...
There is also this group of "native americans" playing, well, native american sounding music, with the pan pipes and flutes and singing and they even have the costumes, straight down to the feather head-dresses. They are on the streets at least 3-4 nights a week.
I also saw a cool tango dance show last week.
Pretty lady in a short black skirt and bright red tights dancing with some guy with a suit and shiny shoes. All we were looking at really was her red legs, as they were so much longer and thinner and brighter than the rest of the black they wore. It was a nice get-up.
Lastly, I saw a ROCKIN´ break-dancing show. These five guys, and they really had the moves. It just got better and better until this one guy put on a helmet and finished the show with a really long, fast headspin in the perfect splits. I had just watched a video on how to do headspins and it gave me a real appreciation for it. This guy was way better than the teachers on the video.

Churros:

Ok, so I passed this little stand on the street today, and had a little piece of happiness. Honestly, I dont usually eat little sugar-coated, fried pieces of white flour, but I just had to try authentic churros. Taco Bell has got nothing on them, that is for sure. I was in heaven for a few moments, until my stomach realized the gut-bomb I just threw down there. Yummy!

Circus Center:

I found a little circus center here a couple weeks ago. My ankle is finally good enough to at least start stretching again and getting ready for my "real" training when I get to NY. I have been going every day for the past couple days. I love it

From Seville to Single

2005-12-03T12:04:00.000-08:00

That about wraps it up.
Corbin, my boyfriend for 22 months and possibly future husband, came here to visit me last week. I knew he was moving on in his mind and we would "have to talk" when he got here. So we did. And it tore me up, but we both agreed that we were doing different things in our lives and we should experience life where we are.
So then, after that discussion, we spent a week together in Barcelona, laughing and having a great time.
We visited all Gaudí´s stuff in Barcelona, the Aquarium, went unicycling with a good size group of unicyclists around the city...
Then, we took a train to the south of spain, to Seville, and spend several days down there. It is so beautiful, all the old buildings...wow. just gotta see it.
He was so camera happy with his new camera and I met up with a couple friends who are living there, one from Los Gatos, and one from my TEFL course that I took last month.
We left last night on the night train, and spent our last night together in our private room with a bed, holding eachother and being rocked to sleep by the moving train. We woke up and watched the sunrise, red and vibrant, over the Mediteranean. It was a precious moment.
And we watched the sunset from the train to the airport at the end of the day, just before we wished eachother a happy life.
Or as he said, "Why should I wish you a happy life? There is nothing to wish for. Just make it happy."
So I will.
So I left.
And I always take the train to and from the airport, but I think sometimes we are just put where we are supposed to be, because this time, for some reason, I took the bus. And I was watching this girl across from me. When the bus got to downtown, I let everyone get off first, and then I noticed a laptop under the chair where that girl was sitting. So I grabbed it and ran down the street to find her, hoping it was hers and someone wouldn´t be really disappointed. When I found her, and held it out to her, the look on her face was all the thanks I needed. She stumbled over her words and looked a little taken aback. Maybe I should have warned her that there are thieves, so be careful, but I guess she learned her lesson in silence. So that is why I took the bus, I guess. So some new tourist wouldn´t start by losing her laptop. And I felt happy.

And then, because I finally have money again, or at least credit, and I just went through a break-up, I went shopping. It always helps.
And I feel ok about this new chapter in my life.
And it means I have more time to think and write and spent time with all of my old friends and people to come into my life.

Big hugs to everyone.
I´m back in Calif. dec. 20.
See ya then,

Louise

Back in Barcelona

2005-11-19T10:41:00.000-08:00

Funny to think as Barcelona as home, but when I got back from Austria, that is what I thought as the plane landed somewhere familiar.
Speaking of plane, that was another intersting story. Apparently my flight back was on Monday, but I was so sure it was on Tuesday. So I left David´s house at 5am and gimped my way to the bus station on my still-sprained ankle. When I got to the airport, there was no flight to Barcelona. So I went back to David´s house and waited outside in the literally freezing cold for an hour, trying to get back inside.

In the meantime, I read another amazing book, well, two, that you should also check out.
"Rapid Recovery from Neck and Back Pain" which is a take off of Dr. Sarno´s book that I mentioned in my last entry. Really inspiring. Highly recommend it.
"Sonrise" which is written by the guy that wrote "Happiness is a Choice." Funny, because my aunt bought that book for me years ago and I just wasn´t ready to hear what it had to say. But now I am, and it has made a world of difference, because he´s right. Happiness really is something we choose. Amazing.
Needless to say, now that I know, I choose happiness every morning and I don´t feel so alone or sad anymore. Life is truly beautiful.

But back to the story.
So on Wed. I went back to the airport at 5am and they told me I had to buy a whole new ticket to get home, for 165 euros. Well, there I was, with my head in my hands, literally sobbing in the airport. I had no money. My stuff had been stolen. I had no credit card and I was stuck in Austria.
The lady at the desk was very nice and brought me hot chocolate. I called David and asked him to work some David magic. Well, they told him I had to pay, but his credit card still wasnt working. In the end, the lady put her job on the line and made us promise to have the money in her account by monday or she would get fired.
And I made it safely back to Barecelona.

I had a great experience in the airport during my layover in Mallorca. There was a woman with two cute 2 year old twins. She obviously needed help with them, so there I was, on the floor in the airport with my guitar, all smiles, laughing and rolling around and playing. And we couldn´t communicate with words because I dont speak German, but it was wonderful. I really treasure all the kids I had in music together and all the kids I had the opportunity to take care of over the years. What a blessing!

As for me now, I am back in Barcelona. I started Spanish classes and I am reading a lot, since my ankle isn´t very strong yet. -- Harry Potter, in spanish this time. It is great from building my vocabulary.
I also wrote another song about my new take on life. I think it is the first happy song I have ever written. Usually I just get inspired when I am sad or hurt or angry. For those of you who haven´t heard my C.D. I made over the summer, I want to try to add a few songs this winter and get a full length C.D. by next year.
I gotta write a couple more songs before that will happen. I´m working on it.

Well, off to see if I can make something out of my life tonight. I am once again down to only $10 which has to last me a week! so I continue to find people who want to buy me drinks or dinner. See if I can work the magic tonight. (Last night I had to jump off the metro at some unknown stop and wait for the next one because this guy that I met that night was trying to force me to kiss him and kept saying he wanted me to have his children. Scary, but I just waited a while and went home when I knew his metro was long gone. Doing my best to be safe in this adventure).

Love to all.

Read the book

2005-11-14T06:13:00.000-08:00

OK, I am turning into one of those people who claim that their lives have been changed by one little book, or a movie, or a person. And this time it is a book with the stupidist title. Are you ready? "Healing Back Pain" by Dr. Sarno. Im telling you, it is the beginning of a new chapter in my life. No more stomach aches (that have been ailing me for 10 years), no more ankle or knee problems (that Ive had since childhood), no more headaches (all my life)... the list goes on. But what Ive learned about chronic pain is going to change the way I view the world. It all comes down to how we react to our environment and how it makes us feel and how we deal with those feelings.
Why did I develope chronic pain as a child?
Not because there was something physically wrong with me. No! Because there was anger and sexual repression and jealousy and fear and guilt and no other way to deal with it as a child because we werent taught to communicate and I wouldnt have felt anyone cared to hear about it anyway. So I protected myself from having to deal with it by getting attention for numerous other ailments. Maybe it all sounds like bologne to you, but I no longer believe that chronic pain has physical causes. Read the book and do the work and see what happens to you.

As for the rest of my life, outside of my latest books, life has improved 100%. Yes, I still burst into tears from time to time, missing my girls, billie and tizbie, and wondering how I will ever truly heal if I lose the man I was planning on marrying...

But it has been so interesting, the growth and processing Ive done this week.
I remember why I was so inspired by David when we were together. He is in dance school in Austria and has such a profound life plan. Now I can separate myself from him and realize that I am not him and have to find my own truths. Yet, somehow, just seeing another artist and dreamer reminds me why I had to do this. Why the struggle is worth it, and why I cant go back. And having a friend to listen and bounce ideas off of in a language I speak fluently was worth the whole cost of the plane ticket.

Austria is so beautiful and the air is crisp with mid-November in every breath. I feel so happy to be alive and am glad I didnt off myself last week when I couldnt see past my own pain. Sometimes I think I am so manic, but alas, that is life. And mine will be not only long, but wide (thanks Todd).
Have a great day, and email me with your thoughts after youve read the book. (but let me buy stocks in his ideas and work first so I can profit off it... just kidding).

Bad luck and lots of laughs

2005-11-09T11:13:00.000-08:00

Oh my god. If I were reading my life in a book, sometimes I would think that person were making things up. The last couple days have been so much bad luck and good luck all rolled into one, tears and laughing and pain and I love my life for it.

To start, I went out unicycling with my only unicycling buddy in Barcelona. I am getting better and I am finally able to hop upstairs. But I wouldnt stop there, no...I had to try to hop up onto and over a big tree root. So I fell, and sprained my ankle really badly. Poor Manuel didnt know what to do with this poor half-crying American girl. So he sat with me for a couple hours until finally we realized I wasnt going to be riding or walking again soon. So picture this: Manuel on his unicycle with me on his back, pushing my unicycle. Yes, it was like a circus in the street. He carried me home and was so sweet.
But the next problem came when I realized my wonderful aunt had wired me money, cuz I was out (again--and I havent even told you about the "getting a new atm card" ordeal) and I needed to pick it up that day. Well, my ankle was the size of a football, but still, I hopped and hobbled my way to the metro stop and downtown to the western union.

I had made plans earlier to meet up with a friend, a massage therapist, and his other two healing type friends, but I had canceled after I fell.
Well, I figured since I had made it downtown, his house was at that point no farther than my own so I went over there. I am so glad. I had someone icing my ankle and taking care of me and I gave and recieved a wonderful massage. We were up till 3am...and might I add, it was all in spanish. Granted, I didnt understand half of it, but I do ok, and it feels good to be in situations like that. That is why Im here, to know the people and experience precious moments.

Well, I didnt sleep much, due to the pain shooting up my leg, the telephone ringing and alarms going off in my room and other rooms at strange hours.
But morning came, and with it came buckets of rain. And I knew it was time to leave the house to finally go to Austria and visit my ex-boyfriend and amazing friend, David. So, I managed my painful way to the train station and got to the airport.
I was pushing time and worried I would miss my flight, when lo- and -behold, there is no ticket in the computer for me! After my wallet got stolen and I had no way to pay for this ticket, david offered to get it for me. Well, apparently his credit card didnt go through, so there I was, ticketless.
Luckily, I was carrying that newly acquired $300 and bought another ticket (again, luckily, for the same price as it would have been when david tried to buy it several weeks ago).
Well, when I was at that desk getting helped, I handed the guy my paper with all my flight info and directions to davids school in Austria. I forget to get it back from him after the whole ticket ordeal, so when i arrived in austria, I had no idea where to go and davids phone was turned off cuz he was in class.
So god sent me an angel. A guy from Spain, with perfect english, who lives in Austria and took an hour out of his day to lead me all over town, carrying my luggage and finally left me safely in this internet cafe, down the street from davids school, where he will meet me in any minute.

So, Im sure the adventure will continue from here.
I have to laugh and love it, or I might burst into tears, but right now the excitement of new adventures with old friends consumes me.
much love to all....have fun out there....

Sunset by the lake

2005-11-07T09:25:00.000-08:00

Each day is a new adventure. One minute I am ready to buy a ticket home, and the next minute I am being taken out to dinner by some nice massage therapist.
I had a horrible day on Saturday, so Sunday I went the beach with my guitar, and sat playing. I met this photographer (same as mentioned above) and we had a nice dinner later that night. He taught me a new song on the guitar and it was a lovely evening.

Earlier that day I got an email from a french unicyclist that is living in Barcelona. Corbin met him online and sent him my info. We spent the whole afternoon riding around the city on unicycles, trying to hop up staircases and riding back down them. It was wonderful. I miss my unicycling days and am happy I have a new friend. (the only one so far that doesn´t seem so interested in me just for my looks--I get so tired of that kind of attention. I just want friends!!!)

The weather here is so beautiful and I sat with another friend by the little lake while he painted my portrait and we watched the sun set behind the birds. It was beautiful.

Yes, life is good at moments, and it is really what you make it, which is why it is sometimes so shitty for me--cuz I dont always look at things the right way. I am still in California in my head, but I am aclimating slowly.

I found a month long spanish course I think I will sign up for if I can get the money together. Still don´t have anyway to access cash after my wallet was stolen. The bank won´t send my new card--arg, but I´ll figure it out.
Also, I leave on Wed. to Austria to go visit my ex-boyfriend and good friend, David, who I haven´t spent any solid time with since we broke up 2 1/2 years ago. It should be fun and inspiring.

Big hugs to all. I miss you guys more than you know.

big, lonely city

2005-11-07T09:20:00.000-08:00

I don´t even know where to start. It´s been a while since I´ve posted
anything.

Details...I finished my TEFL course with a B+ (apparently an A is
next to impossible, or so i´m told). I went to Lyon, France for a
couple days, many crazy hours lost on trains and unable to
communicate in french, but it was ok. Good to see Ama, my friend who
was an au pair in Los Gatos last year. She really understands what i
am going through cuz she went through it not too long ago. I
basically went there cuz after the course ended i was homeless till Nov 1st. Going to france was not a bad option.
I got back on the 1st and moved into my new little apartment. I live
with a few other Spaniards, and my room is the size of a shoebox, but
i have a balcony, which is worth more than a bigger room, and i like
it. I get lots of sun in the room and it makes me happy to know I
secured this place all in spanish, and with the help of my friends,
got money to pay the rent, sin una cartera (without my wallet--since
it was stolen) -- thanks corbin, reis and gypsy.
My days are quite leisurely. I dont have a job, so I sleep in
everyday. I work out all morning. I cook and eat and read and talk to
my housemates, when they have time, practicing my spanish, (cuz none
of them speak english--one of my requirement for my new house). I
usually dont leave the house dressed and ready for the world till
nearly 5pm. I could leave at 2 or 3pm but the world around here shuts
down from 2-5pm, so what´s the point.
I go out sometimes at night. I´ve been rather lonely, but I do have a
couple friends, one of which is "in love with me," or so he says, so
it gets a little complicated, but I continue to be clear that we
are "just friends." I told him tonight i need a night to myself.
I do spend a lot of time alone, though. It is harder than I thought
to assimilate myself into life and culture here. I am just another
white tourist and if I dont want english speaking friends, and I dont
want to sleep with the people who hit on me on the street, then I
spend lots of time alone.

I just got back from not going to a circus that I spent hours looking
for and never found. Bummer.
Instead I sat by the water and cried my eyes out.
I just keep wondering what it is all about. Why did I insist on
giving up the man I love and my friends and job and choir, which I
loved, and move somewhere where I can barely communicate? I dreampt
of it for so long and now I feel so depressed. I knew it wouldn´t be
easy, but that isn´t it. It´s all those questions we start asking
ourselves, like what is the meaning of life?
What are we doing here?
What are we all struggling so hard to achieve?
And why do all the stupid people keep having so many children when
our world can´t support us all and we are bringing them into a
disaster? (no offense to all the amazing parents from music together
that i adore--you are not the stupid people i am talking about).
I want a purpose...dont we all? And I dont just want to consume and
give nothing back. I want to see the world, but really, I dont know
if that was how it was meant to be. I gave someone a talk at a
festival I went to about not trying to see it all, but instead really
experiencing a couple things. I think I need to take my own advice.
But of course, I won´t. I´ll be outta here in a couple months
(painful or not, we´ll see), and then I´ll be in another big, lonely
city, on some other artistic quest.
I keep looking, I think we all do, and I am starting to wonder if
they were right all along that love is all that matters.
And meanwhile, while I sit and ponder the meaning of life, I am
losing my love...

Alas...speaking of love, I love getting comments from folks. Emails
are even better. My email address is the same as it´s always been.
Much love to all my friends and family. It is you that keeps me going
when I feel so alone over here.
Cheers.
(this was written on Nov. 4th but not posted till Nov. 7th)

¿Donde Estan Los Ladrones?

2005-10-25T00:29:00.000-07:00

For those of you who don´t speak spanish, that means "where are the thieves?" Well, i´ll tell you, they are running around with my wallet and causing some difficulty in my life.
There are signs all over the internet cafés, warning people that thieves operate in this zone (literal translation). I am always so careful, and i thought I was being careful on Sat. when i came in here, but I guess not careful enough. Instead of holding my stuff on my lap, like usual, I put my bag under my chair, attached to my chair and my LEG. In the 15 minutes that I was checking my email, before I went on to do my business (banking, etc, for which I needed my purse) they crawled under my table and chair, unzipped my bag, took out my purse and ran off. All while it was attached to me! (good it was or i would have lost my house keys and phone too, when they ran off w- my whole bag). I usually don´t carry my credit and ATM cards with me just for that reason, but I put them in that day to do my accounting.
Well, as you can imagine I went sheet white, running down the street, ready to prosecute any suspicious character. But of course, it was all in vain. When I tried to call my boyfriend, Corbin, back in the states, to get help (waking him up in the middle of the night), the operator wouldn´t let me call that number collect. Well, I told her what I thought. "I´m sorry ma´am, there is nothing I can do. Can I help you with another call?" I wasn´t very nice. So I ran all the way home with my backpack and sandles, like Lola, from "Run, Lola, Run" and got home in time to deal with this all before they started spending money from my account.
Corbin, of course, came to my rescue and gave me bank numbers and such. I called and cancelled all my accounts. In the end I only lost $80 cash, my driver´s license, my jamba juice card :( and some misc. stuff. It is a total hastel, and for those who don´t know, my purse was stolen out of my car in Santa Cruz in July so i just went through this ordeal. But I guess the bright side is that I am getting good at the process.
The worst part is that I have to find a new place to live in the next 3 days and with no money, it is hard to convince anyone to rent to me...especially in my broken spanish, but I´ll figure it out. And I´m building character... I think.

On a lighter note, I got my unicycle shipped over here (thanks, honey) and I have been loving the obstacle course of riding through the city at rush hour, through all the busy people walking to work and the mad taxi drivers. It has been great.

Ok, off to see where I can get money wired to me...wish me luck.

Too Little Time

2005-10-19T10:20:00.000-07:00

I feel like I am always running these days, but those of you who really know me, know that generally, when I am really satisfied, that is the way my life is going.
The TEFL course that I am taking is 2/3 over and it just gets more and more intense. It is nice to be learning and see improvement in my teaching. All the students are like one big happy family now. We are all usually at school for 12+ hours a day, stressing out together, fighting over the computers and trying to figure out the photocopier. It is fun to watch everyone grow as a teacher, and each major project we finish and turn in calls for a beer (although I often bail out on the offer in order to sleep and try to get a workout in the next morning).

Speaking of working out, I have decided to take the apprenticeship with Firefly Dance Co. in NYC starting in January. That puts a slight shift on everything around here. First of all, I want to not only stay in shape, but get into better shape so when I start training many hours a day, I won´t end up hating it or worse, injured. Also, the knowledge that I am only here for another 2 months and not some indefinite length of time changes the way I see everything. I need to decide if I want to stay in Barcelona after the course ends in 10 days or if I should move elsewhere. I have made some friends here, but no one I´m really attached to. I have a couple people I´ve made plans to do an english/spanish conversation practice exchange with, and I don´t really want to leave that, but I could find that again fairly easily, I think, cuz there are tons of people here that study english and want native speakers to practice with.
Housing here is expensive and there aren´t really jobs for Americans like there are for EU folks, and even those are hard to come by because there is so much competition. If I can´t find work and I am just going to study spanish, paying city prices is kind of ridiculous, but moving again is a pain and staying in a hotel while i get myself situated again is also a cost i have to take into account.
It´s all so tricky, and my plan to stay for 3 months now seems silly because this extra 7 weeks after the course is a long time but not really long enough to get a job and support myself.
If anyone has advice or info or encouraging words, feel free to email me or put comments on my blog page.

As far as interesting things, I went to the First Annual Barcelona Contact Improvisation Festival last weekend and it was nice. I met some great people and apparently there is a pretty happening CI scene in Barcelona. (For those of you unfamiliar, contact improv is a dance/movement form that can´t be explained and has to be experienced). It took place in this beautiful place just outside of the city, and we could look out the window, through the beautiful mountains at Barcelona and see the Meditteranean beyond, glowing at sunset. It was beautiful. The people that lived in this place didn´t own it, but were just "squatting" (staying there illegally) and were almost totally self-sustaining, growing their own food and creating space for community activities. About 25 people lived there and it was amazing. Quite a nice old, 3-story building that i think used to be part of an old hospital or something. It was a memorable experience, although there were moments when I felt really out-of-place. I think that is normal with all new people, new customs and languages.

I´m starting to be really convinced about this whole global warming thing. I´ve been reading some articles and it has been raining here like never before, flooding in some places and after the latest "natural" disasters in the states and other places...we are really messing up this planet. There was just an article today in The Guardian about Antartica and the temperature change down there, and how if every year the ice melts a little, it warms the whole planet up and causes a chain reaction because we need the ice to reflect the sun, or it´ll just keep getting hotter, and melt more ice and have less ice to reflect the sun....and you can see where that is leading. We´re in deep shit, I think.

So the moral of the story is, make the most of today, and don´t take your friends for granted. I think those are the lessons I´m learning.

I think that is all for now. It seems I am usually tired and running and every phone card I buy to call you guys back home has a problem. If you want my cell number, email me and i´ll send it to you. I´ll be back in the states for xmas and then I move to NY dec. 30, 2005. Crazy.

Much love,
Louise

Half way done

2005-10-14T07:23:00.000-07:00

The TEFL course I´m taking is proving to be more time consuming than I had originally anticipated. I was warned that it was intense, and although difficult it isn´t, there is a lot of work and keeping up on the tasks is important.

So far I have learned a ton and am really glad I am doing this. When it will come in useful, I am not quite sure, as I have decided to move to NYC in January, but I´m sure at some point it will. I will probably be living over seas again after my one year contract with Firefly Dance Co. ends in Dec. of 2006.

As for adventures around here as of late, there haven´t been many. I´ve been the nerdy student I always am when I am in school. And I have been grateful, too, when other students stumble in 2 hours late and still drunk.

For one of our projects we are supposed to interview a English student (a local that takes english classes here--they are the people we practice on and they pay only 1 Euro/hour for classes). Well, this project is a one-on-one teaching project (to learn to do private lessons). The guy I got just so happens to be a native of Argentina and is also an actor and comedian. Well, I am thrilled to have something in common with him. He was telling me about a circus/theatre company in from Amsterdam for the week. So Wed. night we planned to meet and go to a show. (I called him up and just straight up invited myself--can´t be shy when you are low on time). Well, I hadn´t heard from him by 9:30 and the show was at 10pm, so I went home because I didn´t have directions to the place. I was feeling sort of depressed and lonely. Just as I was brushing my teeth and getting ready for bed, I got a text message from him saying he´d be late and he´d sent directions to get there. Well, I made myself leave the house again and go be social. Unfortunately, it was POURING rain. (There have been articles in the paper about how they haven´t had this much rain in one day in 100 years<---bad translation from spanish to english). And the worst part was that this was mostly an outdoor festival (with no circus but lots of music and theatre). Well, I stayed for awhile until my stomach ache got so bad I could hardly stand (they´ve been really acting up lately, :( as well as a return of headaches). And I never found this guy (can´t blame him for not going out in that weather)...but I wasn´t going to let it get me down, so I sang¨"I´m singing in the rain" all the way to the metro station. When I got home to my door (really the door to the unit I live in and I live upstairs 4 flights up) there was this couple standing in the doorway saying their sweet goodbyes. They looked rather frightened when a wet rat in a red coat showed up.
That was my only attempt to go out this week.
But tonight starts the First Annual Barcelona Contact Improvization Festival, so I am off to go get wet on this camping/dance event. More on that later.

Cheers to all. Much love and I miss you guys. I was looking at some pictures of S.F. on someone´s computer yesterday and I got very homesick.
And good news--Corbin is coming to visit me here for Thanksgiving. Happy day!!!

Through the glass door

2005-10-08T08:42:00.000-07:00

Well, the first week at school was madness. There is so much work in this program , but nothing could compare to the madness of music school. It is very thorough work and I like learning again.
The other students (14 total) are all wonderful, all from the US, UK and Australia.

Last night was the first night we all went out together with all 14 of us. A big first friday celebration that went crazy. We went to a restaurant that was owned by the host person of one of the students, Dan. We all met and walked down there. The food was good, good wine and we talked and talked and it was fabulous to really communicate with other traveling and like-mined people.
Unfortunately, towards the end, Dan thought the door was open, but really, in his drunken state, he didn´t see the glass and walked right through it. A loud crash silenced the room and there was blood dripping everywhere. He ended up being quite lucky and only cutting his hand and leg. He was being drunk though, and refused to get into the ambulance and it was wild. Finally, 5 of us walked to the hospital and waited while he got stitched up. Finally, at 5am, the adventure ended, but it was rather wild,

More later,
my computer time is up.

Decisions

2005-10-02T09:21:00.000-07:00

So now that there are pictures posted of my aerial stuff (thanks to my computer savy boyfriend--i tried to post pictures myself and failed), those of you who have never seen an aerial silk performance will have an idea of what i am talking about.

So my latest decision is this:
To stay in Barcelona, now that i am finally here, or to move to NYC in January to work as an apprectice with Firefly Dance Co., training on aerial silks and learning other circus-type skills.

I attended circus school for 9 months after college, just on the side while also working full time. I worked hard and really loved it, wanting to continue, but I dropped out because it is very expensive and i prioritized moving to Europe. The irony, is that just weeks before finally moving here, while at Burning Man (a huge, week-long art festival), I started learning aerial silks. The classes were free and offered daily and I got really into it, attending everyday and getting to know the people in the company. We had a recital at the end of the week and i got lots of compliments and felt really good about it. I thought it was just for fun and I´d maybe pursue it later if I could find a teacher in Barcelona, when lo and behold, I was offered an apprenticeship in New York by the director, with whom I had been working at burningman. (all photos on this site were taken at Burning Man, most of them taken by some really wonderful Canadian photographer named Greg).

So I have only a couple more days to sign the contract or not.
Now it seems really simple. Free training in an amazing city full of opportunity? What am I waiting for? Well, I just got here, is one problem, after working and saving and planning and i don´t know if i´ll be ready to leave so soon, but the real problem lies elsewhere. Love is a powerful thing, and my boyfriend, Corbin, doesn´t want to live in NY, but is willing to move to Europe with me.
Can we last if I leave here for three months and then to NY for another year? Only time will tell, but I hope so.

So, I welcome all opinions on my situation. "She didn´t know, should she stay? should she go?" (and can you tell me what that is a quote from?)

Arial Silk

2005-10-01T16:58:00.000-07:00

Picures taken at Burning Man by Greg during the Firefly Dance Company´s student recital.

Portrait on the Street

2005-10-01T04:28:00.000-07:00

Hey all--

This is only my second morning waking up in Barcelona, but it feels like I´ve already been here a week.
Yesterday, I spent all day walking around, looking at things, trying to find my school that I will start attending on Monday (A school to get my TEFL certificate--Teaching English as a Foreign Language). I found the school, and walked forever to a bookstore to buy my books, a cell phone, find an outlet converter, and buy some bread and fruit, etc.
But things got interesting when I was sitting on a bench in a plaza, resting my feet, listening to my ipod and picking the seeds out of some very sweet, red grapes. A guy sat down next to me and asked to paint my portrait. Well, I know this money making scam, so I said I couldn´t pay anything. He told me (this was all happening in Spanish, mind you) that he was an art student and if I couldn´t pay, that was ok, he would just do it for practice and keep the drawing. So I agreed. We talked while he drew (charcoal portrait) and he was very nice. My spanish is broken, but we understood eachother. Before he left, he said he was going out that night with some of his friends from Ireland and asked if i wanted to go. Well, I don´t know what else I was going to do but continue to wander around alone, so we made plans to meet again at 9pm.

At 9:00, he was right there where he said he´d be. Now, just so you can be in the moment with me, he was wearing the same dirty jean, black t-shirt and backpack as that day, and he has a mullet, as does just about every young woman in this city. (What is with the serious layering of hair and thinning cuts?) We walked around and he showed me various plazas. We ate dinner on the patio at his art school and he was so patient with my spanish. I felt more confident every hour and was understanding more and more of what he said, when he spoke slowly.
We went to a bar called ¨"The Black Sheep" where we were supposed to meet his friends. Only one of them was there, and he was a riot, this guy. He kept trying to spout things off in English, as he told me about his 22 yr old girlfriend and her baby, and about the history of this and that.
We got on the metro and went to the outskirts of town to a smokey bar. Ok, so Irish or not,his friends were all a bunch of heavy metal kids, wearing dark clothes, black eye-liner and all the guys had long hair. They were drinking cheap beer and smoking and listening to ACDC and Metalica, and no one had an irish accent or even spoke English! I was amazed as I looked around and many of the surrounding tables had at least one member who would stand up and play their air guitar, mouth all the words and shake their hair around like a head-banger. I didn´t have the heart to tell them that was so uncool in most circles in the states.
Well, they all spoke Catalán, not Spanish, and definitely not english, so i was totally as a loss between the languages and the noise. Finally, the smoke was making my eyes water, and this guy I was with, Carlos, was very nice and took me outside. He asked if I was tired, and they all walked me the long walk back to my hotel.
It apparently was an early night for around here, as I was back to my hotel before 3am.
I am very appreciative for the tour and how kind and accepting they all were, especially with my poor communication skills in Spanish, but I am not quite sure if that was really my crowd of choice. Interesting, though.

Until tonight´s adventures, I am off to study for Monday´s classes, now that i finally have my books.

Welcome to Spain

2005-09-30T05:10:00.000-07:00

Wow. It is amazing all the everyday things that we do so simply and take for granted. Showing up in a new country alone is really a trip. Just finding an internet café is a job in itself.

Let´s back up. I spent my last day in the states on Wed. Sept. 28, 2005. However fast I ran, it didn´t seem as though I would get everything done, and alas, I left a lot for my boyfriend, Corbin, to clean up, (thanks, hun) but at least I caught my plane. All flights on time, no problem. I had a few hour layover in London Heathrow, which I passes stretching in some vacant terminal until I got kicked out. I was so hungry but i didn´t have any pounds and didn´t want to convert money when i would only be there for a couple hours. i survived.

I met a nice German guy, Leo, on the plane from London to Barcelona, which encouraged me to reach out a little more. I guess the difference was that he spoke perfect english. We had planned to have dinner in Barcelona, but his luggage got lost, so he told me to go on ahead of him. It was good I did or I would have had a harder time finding a place for the night, as it was already nearly 9pm.

So, standing in the Barcelona airport with a cart full of luggage and not a soul in the country that was expecting me, I began to dig through my Barcelona guide book to find a hotel. But making a phone call requires a phone card which requires Euros, and I still hadn´t eaten since the San Francisco airport...
I finally got on the phone with a hotel person and although talking in spanish for something as basic as a room isn´t so bad, understanding their really fast castillian spanish was another story. She told me she had no room but recommended a friend´s hotel. Oh great. I couldn´t understand the name or address but at least got the phone number. I called him. He said he had room, but I couldn´t understand him and didnt want to get lost in the night, looking for some alleged hotel that i couldn´t find because i was too proud to say i didnt´understand. Finally I told him to hold and asked a nearby person for help. Unfortunately, he didnt speak engish or spanish but his girlfriend did so she got on the phone and translated for me. The little piece of information she picked up that i didn´t was that if i wanted this room, i had to arrive by 10pm. It was 9:30 and the bus station was in another terminal. Scratch the bus, i´d have to pay for a taxi.
I found the sign for taxi and the line was at least 100 people long. It just can´t be that hard, can it? I just had to laugh, but i waited in line.

Well, the taxi driver got me to this little hotel on the 4th floor by 9:55 pm. (actually, he got me down the street, and lugging all my stuff the last block was a funny scene--barbara, without your rolling suitcases, i´d probably still be pulling my other bag, thanks).
I am lucky because the room is only 20 euros per night, which is cheaper than some hostels around here. no frills, and no pillows, but hey, a bed is good.
I slept for 12 hours, not because i was really that tired, but i had no clock and there are no windows so i couldn´t tell if it was morning or night. i kept waking up and just telling myself it was the middle of the night. finally i heard someone moving around and by the time i got out of the hotel, it was 10:30am. oh well.

So here I am, in the Las Ramblas district, looking as American as they come with China Red hair and skin so pale I might as well be from Ireland.
The dialect is harder to understand than i expected, but I´ll learn.
It´s just tripping me out how life can change so fast. I was just at work in the US, with a house and boyfriend and family 2 days ago, and now i am here, homeless, friendless and unemployed, unable to communicate and unsure of what to do next. But I feel good and free and alive and I do know that good things will come and life is an advenure.

Emails are always welcome at munigirl@ekit.com

Until next time, have a blast!

Arial silk

2005-09-29T08:06:00.000-07:00

Here are some arial silk pictures:

http://www.corbinstreehouse.com/pictures/thumbnails.php?album=4

(on Corbin's website).

--corbin (posted via requst of Louise).

Hi everybody!

2005-09-27T11:51:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone, I got my new blog setup. Be sure to check it out to see what is happening in my life!
Louise (via corbin)